Why I need to let my daughter experience life

It was just me and her sitting at a roadside bar, sipping some Bud and talking ‘girlie stuff’.

Oh wait, did I just see ‘Bud’ in a dream where I was with my darling daughter. Hell no! What kind of irresponsible mother sees a dream like that? I might have enjoyed my drink to the last hiccup but am I not supposed to forbid my daughter from doing the same?
And not just that, there are a whole lot of things and activities that I feel I must censor or ban, in spite of taking a shot at it myself and not regretting a single misadventure. Or should I?

1) Late-night Rendezvous
There is something about watching a sky full of stars from the little hideout of yours. The possibility of your parents busting that ‘pillow-under-the-quilt’ trick, well, that is priceless. I can still feel the goosebumps recalling how we used to push the car out of the garage at neutral. Jump-starting it like half a kilometer down the street. God forbid if my daughter does the same. Lol

2) All Girls Trip


A bunch of giggling girls, junk food, a map and a highway with miles and miles of nothingness. Any parent’s worse nightmare would be a tad less horrifying, than this. But it is a crash course to ‘grow up and face the world’. The experiences make for more than just cherished memories

3) Bunking Classes

The person who always had an audience enthralled at the corner table of the canteen. The one you exchanged your class notes with for the best books, music and advice. The one who always managed the first-day-first-show. The one who always arranged for food, even midnight snacks. Yes, I know that person rather personally.

4) Alcohol

Nothing less than ‘Tiger’ beer introduced me to the teenage world of vices. Years later I graduated to Tia Maria, Peach Schnapps, Bacardi and Cabernet Sauvignon. Still struggling to figure out whether its peer pressure or taste pleasure that keeps one going. But I cannot let my daughter try this, can I now?

5) Boys, Especially Bad Boys 

It is what rom-coms are made of. It is bit stretching to fall for a vampire, but thrilling to fancy a man with a darker side to him. Remember Juan Antonio, Vicky Cristina Barcelona or Daniel Cleaver, Bridget Jones’s Diary? And still one survives and laughs over it in an article, years later. Wink wink.

6) Teenage parties
When the only things higher than the hemlines are the hormones. Music is loud, hours are wild, but not wilder than the parents’ imagination. Especially if you have a daughter. Sometimes I wonder if CCTV’s was invented by an overzealous parent? But this also make me realise that I need my daughter to trust me enough to let me in, on those things. Its better to know where and with whom she is, rather than not.

I wish I have the courage to let go. The courage to trust my own upbringing. Just the way I wanted my parents to. Because we are nothing if not our experiences.

Tell us, KetchupMoms, any secrets you hold close as a daughter’s mother. Would love to catch up.

Comments (1)

Salma Posted on Nov 02, 2017

Definitely some interesting points


Charu Chhitwal

Charu Chhitwal, Founder KetchupMoms has daring tastebuds, a love for travel and an owl for her soul. It’s little wonder then that she loves to write and share her tips and tricks on traveling, food,

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